The last past weeks were pretty though. Most of the time I did not how I got through the day. Now I have hope. Everyone told me that the healing process would have been a rollercoaster of emotions, and it is. But I’m trying to go through it. If you feel the same way as I do, I’m certain that you will make it. I did not know what helped me today. Now I’m feeling better than this morning.

Today I went to Milan to attend the appointment with my speech therapist. I had lunch with a friend of mine. The talking I did with him helped me to clear out my mind. I’ve realized that not every day will go as planned, not every month will go as planned. The only thing I have to do is listen to myself. Another help is to give small achievable goals. It is ok if I do not carry out all of them. At least I tried. It helps me also thinking about the improvement I made over the past days. The reasoning I made, the reaction I had against negative thoughts. Also, if my opinion is against others it is okay. It is good to listen to them, but I shall made my choice, based on what I feel it is right for me.

Yes, today I did not study. It was the last appointment with my speech therapist. This journey has given me a lot of self-esteem. Being able to control my breath is satisfying, it gives me positive sensations. It seems like, controlling the breathing allows me to better handle my anxiety. And when I did not succeed in this process, it means that I shall give myself more time. More time to store the sensations, more time to familiarize with the exercises. Maybe I am not in a good mood, I am tired. I had a bad day. I am stressed out. To be able to perform correctly the exercises, I shall first relax, get in touch with my body. And then I can continue. I shall also be consistent. Consistency is the key to learning.

A take on message from this experience is that emotions, past experience and events impacts on your body. To get something done you shall be patience with yourself. Listen to your body, get in touch with your emotions. Try to find a way that most suits you to learn what you need to. Even though it can be hard sometimes, you shall be consistent. In case you do not succeed in it, it is okay. You shall not feel guilty. You shall search what boost your motivation and think about it. Maybe writing or talking to someone will help you. Everything will flow spontaneously. Also, you shall allow yourself to make mistake. Mistakes allow you to learn the most. And, as a friend told me, ‘always remember to smile’.